Why "Indy 4" Scares the Bejeezus Out of Me: Part Three

No foreplay today, too much to do. Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty. You know where I stand on the series and a few of my early problems, so here’s the bottom line. Spielberg’s casting of Shia LeBeouf was the potential final nail in Indy 4’s coffin for me. He’s been given an as yet unnamed role in the film. It’s been confirmed but the PTB are refusing to say exactly who he’s playing. Why all the coy games? Because we’ve seen enough of Spielberg’s work to know exactly who LeBeouf's playing and good ol’ Stevie figures he’ll dick around with us long enough so that we’ll forgive and forget when we find out the truth. It has to be Indy’s kid. That’s the only plausible explanation. And guess what? I’ll give you no worse then two to that they won’t like each other.

To be honest, I’ve beaten this horse, not just to death, but to a blood and guts Eli Roth sort of pulp. This angle of strained father/son relationships goes all the way back to E.T. and hasn’t stopped. Not only hasn’t it stopped, it’s cropped up just about everywhere. Jurassic Park, The Lost World, Hook, War of the Worlds, Last Crusade, A.I., Catch Me If You Can, these account for half the feature length films that he’s released since 1989. Frankly what bothers me isn’t the fact that it’s been a recurring theme, it’s that it only seems to crop up in his worst films. In the past twenty years, the best stuff he’s done (with the exception of Minority Report) hasn’t gone anywhere near the f*&^ed up family angle. It only seems to be an issue when he can’t come up with anything better and it shows.

Bottom line, if Indy’s kid is in this film I’m pretty sure it’s gonna suck because it’s a sure-fire sign that they ran out of ideas, which is never good. Another thing that could get old real quick is if they beat Ford’s age to death. Okay, we get it, he’s in his sixties and everybody’s questioning whether or not he can handle it. If you wanna address it, fine, but don’t go overboard. I’d like to think they’re smarter then that but the self-referential nature of Last Crusade tells me otherwise.

Now does the film have anything going for it? Absolutely. Cate Blanchett is one of the absolute best actresses around and she’s in this movie. That alone counts for a lot. Jim Broadbent is excellent as well. I haven’t seen Shia LeBeouf in anything but I’ve read that he’s very, very good. The potential is there. This role fits Ford like a glove and if he didn’t love playing Indy, he would never have gone back to it. It will be nice to see him playing a part with the same sort of vigor that we used to see all the time. He’s been so obviously sleepwalking through most of his films lately that it’s been tough to take so here’s hoping.

I wanna be excited about this. I want this film to work. I want to walk into that theater next summer and get chills when the Paramount logo comes on screen. I wanna wet myself like a four year old over Williams’ music and the inevitable sneaky reveal of Harrison Ford wearing that hat again. History’s making me leary though. In the end, all we can do is wait and cross our fingers. Make no mistake though, I’ll be there on opening night with every other nerd in the free world whispering the words "Please don't suck" quietly to myself.

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Because we were so patient, here’s Mr. Ford in costume for the first time in almost twenty years. I’m assuming his walker is just off camera. (Take THAT Mom!!)


Later.